So I just realized that my last blog was my 100th blog written since 2010. I'm super proud of myself for sticking with this writing space and I am super happy that you have supported me through it all. If I had some wine I would make a toast, but I don't, so I will settle for being happy :)
Sunday, December 23, 2012
Out with the old, in with the new
Well the world didn't end on Friday as they said it would, which means that we have either been had or we don't completely understand the Mayan calendar. Since the world didn't come to an end and I am still alive and breathing, I guess it's time I updated this blog. I love this time of year, not necessarily because of Christmas or thoughts of snow or presents, but because the new year is approaching and this is one of my bigger reflection periods. I have been reflecting A LOT on 2012 and what the year held for me, what lessons it presented to me, and what I plan on doing in the new year. Before I go into the lessons learned, I wanted to highlight the positive things that occurred in 2012. Here it goes...
-I traveled over 15000 miles (NYC x4, Chicago x2, Chincoteague Island, Atlantic City x2, Puerto Rico, Nigeria, Virginia x3 (outside the DMV area), Jacksonville, FL and some smaller day trips in between)
-GRADUATED! Finished the requirements and received my masters degree
-Welcomed a new niece :)
-Made new friends
-Experienced a hot, sweaty summer in DC
-Quit my job without a backup plan
Ok, the last one may not have been a highlight but it definitely was a great lesson in self-worth and personal happiness. This year has been filled with ups and down, frustration, anger, sadness, happiness, and joy. This year has been by far the most challenging one for me as an adult and although at times I was ready to throw in the towel, throw my hands up, and walk away (maybe to an island maybe back to Africa), I stuck with it as I did through other challenging times and the lessons that came from this year are invaluable. So on to the lessons...
1. Don't expect people to understand your happiness-Some times people are unhappy or don't share in the happiness you have, that doesn't mean you have to stop being happy or limit your happiness. The world is getting crazier and crazier and if you're able to find happiness and hold on to it, more power to you. I've said it before, but never let someone compromise your happiness, even if that means having to walk away or create space away from those negative nellies.
2. Learn to be still-this was by far the most challenging thing that I learned this year. I can't be still, I don't know what that means, I can't remember the last time I had non-stop stillness and this year due to some fortunate circumstances, I was able to take some time to be still. To think, to plan, to figure out where I am headed next and what I want. It wasn't easy, but I am more and more comfortable being still.
3. Have no regrets or thoughts of second chances- Life is meant to be lived and there is a chance that you won't get another opportunity to take advantage of. If there is something you want to do, do it. If there's someone you love, love them. Act as if there will never be another opportunity after the first and love and live life as much as you can.
4. Don't be afraid to take a step back and focus on yourself- I have always been a "people pleaser" and have always been the shoulder to lean on and a listening ear, but I realize that by doing so i'm exhausting myself mentally which has taken a toll on the physical. It's hard not always being there for others, but I can no longer invest and be there for others when it results in something negative for my well-being.
5. Letting go- I'm still putting this into practice, but this year it has gotten better. Sometimes you just have to let it go. Whether it's a job, a person, experience, or thing. If all signs are pointing to the fact that it's not yours and never will be, then let it go. When you let things go, you open up the space for the things you're supposed to have to come.
6. An unpleasant situation is only unpleasant because of your attitude- Look at the perspective you take on things. I try to remain positive in my thoughts, even during the most trying times, and I find that when I do those trying times are little less miserable and a little more enjoyable.
7. Be Present- With all the technology and social media, being present is becoming increasingly difficult. I reached my breaking point. I am tired of being in a space, having an experience and instead of being present in that moment, i'm updating something about that moment. What sense does it make to constantly update fb about what i'm doing and with who instead of actually being there in that moment enjoying those I am with.
8. Pay attention to the actions, not just the words- People will tell you what you want to hear and we live in a space where manipulation is the norm. People will talk, but actions talk louder and if your actions don't follow your words, then those words are worth as much as an expired gift card...nothing.
Each year when I reflect on what lessons have been presented, I create goals that will coincide with them and will allow for me to put my lessons into action. I am excited for all that 2013 has to hold, I know that it will be a great year because I will make it one. So for all those that are reading this, I wish you well and with much happiness in the new year.
Out with 2012, in with 2013...
Watch out, i'm coming back with a vengeance.
-I traveled over 15000 miles (NYC x4, Chicago x2, Chincoteague Island, Atlantic City x2, Puerto Rico, Nigeria, Virginia x3 (outside the DMV area), Jacksonville, FL and some smaller day trips in between)
-GRADUATED! Finished the requirements and received my masters degree
-Welcomed a new niece :)
-Made new friends
-Experienced a hot, sweaty summer in DC
-Quit my job without a backup plan
Ok, the last one may not have been a highlight but it definitely was a great lesson in self-worth and personal happiness. This year has been filled with ups and down, frustration, anger, sadness, happiness, and joy. This year has been by far the most challenging one for me as an adult and although at times I was ready to throw in the towel, throw my hands up, and walk away (maybe to an island maybe back to Africa), I stuck with it as I did through other challenging times and the lessons that came from this year are invaluable. So on to the lessons...
1. Don't expect people to understand your happiness-Some times people are unhappy or don't share in the happiness you have, that doesn't mean you have to stop being happy or limit your happiness. The world is getting crazier and crazier and if you're able to find happiness and hold on to it, more power to you. I've said it before, but never let someone compromise your happiness, even if that means having to walk away or create space away from those negative nellies.
2. Learn to be still-this was by far the most challenging thing that I learned this year. I can't be still, I don't know what that means, I can't remember the last time I had non-stop stillness and this year due to some fortunate circumstances, I was able to take some time to be still. To think, to plan, to figure out where I am headed next and what I want. It wasn't easy, but I am more and more comfortable being still.
3. Have no regrets or thoughts of second chances- Life is meant to be lived and there is a chance that you won't get another opportunity to take advantage of. If there is something you want to do, do it. If there's someone you love, love them. Act as if there will never be another opportunity after the first and love and live life as much as you can.
4. Don't be afraid to take a step back and focus on yourself- I have always been a "people pleaser" and have always been the shoulder to lean on and a listening ear, but I realize that by doing so i'm exhausting myself mentally which has taken a toll on the physical. It's hard not always being there for others, but I can no longer invest and be there for others when it results in something negative for my well-being.
5. Letting go- I'm still putting this into practice, but this year it has gotten better. Sometimes you just have to let it go. Whether it's a job, a person, experience, or thing. If all signs are pointing to the fact that it's not yours and never will be, then let it go. When you let things go, you open up the space for the things you're supposed to have to come.
6. An unpleasant situation is only unpleasant because of your attitude- Look at the perspective you take on things. I try to remain positive in my thoughts, even during the most trying times, and I find that when I do those trying times are little less miserable and a little more enjoyable.
7. Be Present- With all the technology and social media, being present is becoming increasingly difficult. I reached my breaking point. I am tired of being in a space, having an experience and instead of being present in that moment, i'm updating something about that moment. What sense does it make to constantly update fb about what i'm doing and with who instead of actually being there in that moment enjoying those I am with.
8. Pay attention to the actions, not just the words- People will tell you what you want to hear and we live in a space where manipulation is the norm. People will talk, but actions talk louder and if your actions don't follow your words, then those words are worth as much as an expired gift card...nothing.
Each year when I reflect on what lessons have been presented, I create goals that will coincide with them and will allow for me to put my lessons into action. I am excited for all that 2013 has to hold, I know that it will be a great year because I will make it one. So for all those that are reading this, I wish you well and with much happiness in the new year.
Out with 2012, in with 2013...
Watch out, i'm coming back with a vengeance.
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